Total Pageviews

Saturday, December 29, 2012

Time Flies......Shit Happens....

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I know it's been FOREVER, but I've had a lot going on, mkay? So my therapist won't see me anymore (don't worry, I'll talk about that later), and since I still feel like a nut case, I thought I should get back into this blogging thing so I won't lose my fucking mind. So many crazy things have happened in the last 4 years, that I really do not know where to begin. Since I plan on exposing my soul soon enough in this blog within the near future, I figured I would give you the bullet points for now...... -Got a great job offer that would bring me back home and closer to family. -met up with an old boyfriend and moved in with him right away in a whirlwind romance. -job tanked because it sucked royally so decided to quit sucky job and go back to school. -got into s huge fight with my entire family that I moved home to be closer to and quite talking to them. It's been 4 years since I've had a healthy relationship with them. -prince charming ended up being KING ASSHOLE and I found myself stuck in. Miserable relationship where I was emotionally and verbally abused. Of course I had no one to call on for help because my family isn't talking to me, just about me. -sucked it up and tried to make the best of the situation focusing on my schooling and my children. -7 months ago found out KING ASSHOLE was also a pedophile and had been raping my daughter since she was 14. All of this was discovered the day before Mother's Day. - instantly became homeless, with no money, no family, no job, notta. Zip. Zero. Zilch. -my children and I have been living with my best friend so that I can finish school. I'm pretty sure she is ready to get rid of us by now. -4 more months and will graduate college and be able to support my family (if I survive). -The trial for King Asshole begins in January, although I am sure it is going to get postponed a million times before we see justice. If the judicial system does not fail us, the son of a bitch will spend the next 30 years in prison. -I have been to the darkest of darkest places because of this. I would be lying if I said I haven't considered giving up and taking my own life. - one tiny step at a time I am rebuilding a life for my children and me. - I now work every weekend at the hospital and have been offered a job as an RN upon graduating. - my daughter and I got into a huge fight because I am having a shitty time dealing with all the emotions of hurt, anger, sadness, and most of all guilt. I made her go live with her father before we hit rock bottom which ended up blowing up in my face and she now hates me because she thinks I kicked her out. - my shitty family has pounced on the opportunity to get in good with my daughter because of this without giving two shits about me or my feelings. -I am slowly trying to teach myself forgiveness, humility, hope, and faith. This is going to be a long journey........